Today was better than yesterday, but still some frustration, for me at least.
May I start with some bad humour?
As a wife, so far, I've realized what really sucks about this Leukemia thing is the role reversal in the car. I'm driving everywhere including downtown. Richard is in the passenger seat. Need I say more? I'll let you figure out how much I'm enjoying that.
As for Richard, I'm pretty sure he still thinks that Leukemia is the worst part about Leukemia, not being in the passenger seat. But, I could be wrong.
So, this morning, we didn't have to wake early. It was nice Richard got to sleep in a little bit, and nice that Dexter didn't do his 'early waking' that he's been doing.
I'll go off on a little tangent for the 'blog baby book' here for a second...
Dexter is a few weeks overdue for being switched over to one nap. But it's really hard to do right now, obviously. I can't always be home to help him with this transition and he really loves his morning nap.
AJ said something adorable in the car today: "Mommy, you're letting the sun race with you!". He was noticing how the sun looks like it's following beside a person when they're driving.
Another funny thing was when I heard what sounded like AJ smacking the DVD player in the car.
Me - "What was that noise?"
AJ - "Nothing."
Me - "No seriously. What was that? Tell me the truth? Did you hit the DVD player?"
AJ - "I said nothing!"
Me - "Who hit the DVD player?"
AJ - "Oh, it was Dexy."
Me - "Yah, no. Dexy's asleep dude. Nice try. Did somebody hit the DVD player because that's what it sounded like."
AJ - "Oh, yah. It was Jack. He left his house and did it."
Me - "Jack is at his house and is probably in bed already since it's way past your bed time."
AJ - "Oh. Yah. It was me."
Rest assured, Erica, if you're reading this, Jack does not spend the whole day being prosecuted for another boy's crimes when he's at my house.
I digress. Back to the story.
We packed the boys with us this time. I wanted AJ to see the hospital we've been talking about so much. And, I really just wanted to see the boys. We were away from them about 4 or 5 days the past week. It's been tough.
Jen (thank you thank you) had already dropped me off a coffee, picked up AJ to take him to swimming, bought him a doughnut for putting his face in the water, brought him back, and brought Richard and I some handy meal stuff from M&M. I also didn't mention yet that last night, when she called, I was just about to head to Superstore to get the cat litter we so desperately needed. Jen picked that up for us. So heavy too. And she hates cats! That's friendship.
We left a little before 1:00pm. The appointment was for 2:30pm. Based on the other trips to the hospital, we had more than enough time.
But. Ooooh, how I hate the Port Mann. There was an accident just before the Port Mann, an accident just after the Port Mann near Gaglardi, and horrendous construction at Cambie. I was just about to burst into tears I was so hot and getting so claustrophobic. It was yucky. AJ slept the whole way. Dexter, of course, woke as soon as the traffic started before we even reached the Port Mann, which put a bit of a wrench in my 'shape of the day' so to speak.
We didn't pull into the parking lot until about 2:40pm. As we're unloading the car, Richard's cell rings. It's the hospital. They'd like to admit him today. Yah.... no. That's not going to happen. Richard learned the lesson yesterday that he definitely doesn't want to be doing anything of importance at the hopital when it's not normal operating hours and his doctor isn't there. Not to mention, we just have a lot of 'loose ends' that MUST be tied before Richard goes in the hospital. AND... we just weren't prepared. Everyone kept saying that we wouldn't be admitted until Monday or Tuesday. I could go on and on.
Anyhow, we walk over to the elevator in the parkade with the boys in the stroller and our bags and stuff and......
The elevator is only in use mon-fri. Are you kidding me? This is the same place we've parked ont the same floor for our past 4 visits. So, we had to walk up the 3 floors of the parkade ramps. We couldn't take the stairs with the stroller.
We got up there. Of course, the nurses were just all over AJ and Dexter absorbing their cuteness and loving every minute of it. I had brought AJ and Dexter their fold out Matchbox Cars play sets. We had a nice big roomy room. It was all good.
We had been told on Friday, by someone who will remain nameless that if they did end up having a bed available and admitting Richard on the weekend (which really just 'wasn't good for us'...lol), we could probably be admitted and then ask for a day pass to come in on Monday.
Richard inquired. Now, you remember how steamed I was about yesterday? I really wanted to vent to someone. Richard just really wanted me to be pleasant. I started to speak, but I was given the 'zip it' eye from Richard which, I have to say, I've never been given before. Well, maybe once. But, I got the hint. This was not the appropriate time for me to 'go off' about how frustrated I am, when essentially, we're about to ask for a favour.
They had to call the doctor (I think - Richard will fill you in more on his blog later with extra detail if you want, as I was not privy to these conversations, as I was watching the boys). Basically, the person he was explaining the situation to just really couldn't fathom why Richard would not want to be admitted as soon as possible.
Long story short on that - Technically, we 'gave up' Richard's spot. But, he's top priority for a new bed, and should be in on Tuesday or Wednesday. I was going to get Richard to just hop on here and type about this part, but alas, he's crashed on the couch beside me. Poor guy. I can't imagine what all is running through his head. In fact, I'm kind of wondering how he sleeps at all.
So, our appointment to change the dressings and get instructions on care for his Hickman Line, were not that. It was just a dressing change. That's right. 24 degrees in a car with two kids, no A/C, a back seat driver sitting in the passenger seat beside me who's in pain and a little grumpy (albeit justifiably), with a claustrophobic wife, with two car accidents and construction, who live down the road from a Cancer Clinic, for a 1.5 hour drive, JUST TO GET A BANDAGE CHANGED. But for good measure, she drew some blood too. I'm glad, because while all 'zipped up' over in the corner with the kids justa holdin back for venting everything I'm feeling, I was thinking that I was about to draw some blood!!!!! Oh, and a good thing too, was that the nurse gave Richard a necklace with three clips to hold up the tubes that are hanging out of his chest. This was wonderful for Richard. He's really squirmish, I think, or maybe just cautious about these 'creepy' tubes. It's obviously, a weird new thing for him. It's hard to say if his neck is so sore because of the pain from the long drawn out procedure or from his rigidness as he tries not to disrupt the tubes and such and worries about them. Know what I mean? He was really uncomfortable last night and into this morning.
The boys were okay. Not great. Obviously, Dexter had not had his full nap, and AJ is showing the effects of being away from us so much lately, and no doubt sensing how preoccupied we are. He's been a little defiant and sassy. (No idea where he gets that from). That all didn't stop the nurses from loving them though. They were calling other nurses from down the hall to come see them. I think we were the only people in the Leukemia (BMT) daycare ward that day, but there were 5 nurses in our room at one point.
Do I want to bring the boys there in the future? I'm not looking forward to it, no matter how much a mom loves to hear how cute her kids are.
So, all in all, maybe 30 minutes. Then back in the car. We had already been keeping in touch with my dad who didn't get to meet up with us on Friday. So, we made sure that we got to see him today while we had the boys with us. I wanted to boys to get a chance to run around before taking them to dinner, so I called a friend to hear of any great playgrounds in Richmond (thanks Nomi!!! The boys loved the water feature, those crazy swing saucers, and that really long slide). After about 30 minutes at the park with Grand-Dan, we all headed to Spaghetti Factory. The boys were pretty good. They weren't angels, but they were two pretty good toddlers at a restaurant. (Thanks Dad!)
We put Dexter in his PJ's while Dad tossed AJ in the air about 50 times and we left for home! We stopped at our 24 Hour Shoppers Drug Mart for Richard's Tylenol Threes and got some gas for probably the 4th time this week, ugg, and got in the door about 10pm. Dexter transferred into bed wonderfully and had slept the whole way home.
More thanks -
Dad - Dinners, lunches, probably more dinners and lunches to come. Your hospitality (he lives in Richmond and has a fold out if we ever need it), and the many more times you'll probably be getting to have your share of babysitting the boys!!!
Mom - Everything you've been doing to help which is more than I can even write.
Erica - Everything you've been doing to help and for the Franklin Goes to the Hospital book that you dropped off today and we read today too. It was such a sweet thought.
Norma - Who's going to be coming to stay with us for a while in about a week! It will be so wonderfuly to see you. AJ's really excited.
Nomi - For suggesting a great park.
Michelle R. - For your phone call that I didn't hear until 10pm. I'll try to get back to you soon!
Everyone who's been constantly offering help! - I do love to hear from you all! Thank you for all your offers. I am keeping you in mind! Trust me! It's not that I'm not willing to ask for help! It's just that I'm surrounded by so many wonderful and close friends and family that I just haven't needed to reach out further yet! Thank you thank you!
Too lazy to edit, as usual. Sorry.
wife of a recently diagnosed 'back seat driver',
I mean wonderful husband.
Love you so much, Richard.