Feel free to skip to the part titled "My Man" if you'd just like to know about Richard, rather than listening to me document my journey.
My Boys
A busy, but quiet morning some day this week.
And while I took a shower......
Puzzles!
AJ's been busy drawing some pretty cool characters lately.
It says, "thes R DIMObots".
Which he read out to me as, "These are Dimobots" ...... which are actually Dinobots. You know - From Transformers?
My BFFs
Tuesday, I told Jen to drop off her kids and my coffee so she could have a nice quiet time at Costco, and I think Walmart, and so I could be lazy instead of playing with my children.
Here are the Tuesday-friends:
Jaxon, Makenna, AJ, Emerson, and Dexter.
Jen wasn't gone too long and we got to visit once she came back. Thanks J.
Erica took AJ for a playdate on Wednesday while my sister was with the boys. I got to visit with Erica, myself, on Friday afternoon. Thanks E.
Girls, we couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thanks for all the ways you've been helping!
Sewing and Blogging and Avoiding My Feelings
So, I've been sewing lots this past week. Probably to avoid my feelings and being alone with my thoughts and just because it makes me happy. I was probably avoiding my housework too.
Then, I got some housework done. I was probably enjoying the sense of 'control'. Avoiding the lack of control that I have in real life right now.
Then, I came on the blog tonight, probably to avoid my sewing that I was using to avoid my housework and my feelings.
And what do I do on the blog? I talk about my feelings!
Craziness.
The Living Room
Slip Covers for my pillows.
Little blankets for the boys that double as covers for the cat-scratched arms of the couch. Darned #$%*& cats.
Our Bedroom
Pillows for decoration. I'm sure Richard will just LOVE their pointlessness and the fact that they are just one more thing to have to take off the bed before he goes to sleep at night.
The inspiration fabric that started it all.
Dexter's Room
This lady was selling a valance that matched Dexter's sports theme room perfectly. Used it to make two pillow cases and two trims for his comforter that I cut in half (to make two comforters).
Last Night
Mom and Ken (and Paul) came by for a great visit, to eat some of the boys Hallowe'en candy, thank goodness, to hang out, and to 'do a trade' involving them taking away some furniture.
It was a great visit, and after doing all that sewing I've been doing, I've been dying to show my mom what I've been up to. And of course, I got a big dose of much needed **Debbie-Cat.
**For the few of you out there who are unfamiliar with the term Debbie-Cat it is in reference to my mom's amazing ability to sincerely make someone feel like a million bucks doing anything. Hence, my reasonably great amount of self-confidence. When you grow up with a Debbie-Cat for a mom, you grow up thinking you can do anything and that everything you do is pretty great.
Why the 'cat' part? That's a story for another time, perhaps. Many of you already know. Maybe one day, I'll use my blog post for my sister, brother, and I's plans to make a Debbie-Dictionary. I don't think my mom would like that, but Kim, Paul, and I sure would.
***********A Thank You Break***************
Thanks Mom and Ken for coming by and everything else you've been doing. Thanks mom for taking the boys this upcoming Thurs/Fri so I can stay with Richard at the hospital again. We couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thanks for all the ways you've been helping!
********************
Today
I was so proud of myself for preparing the boys for the time change by working their bedtimes later and later through the month of October and their wake times too.
I was so proud of myself for remembering to turn the clocks back last night to make sure I was up in time to get to AJ's one-time skateboarding lesson in Vancouver at 10am.
I was so proud of myself for actually leaving the house by the planned time of 8am this morning with the kids packed, lunch packed, drinks packed, fun packed, dvd player packed, whiteboards packed, and looking pretty darned good I have to say. I felt good.
Now, y'all know it's not my thing, but, it fits in here perfectly.....
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2
I will break down your stubborn pride. Leviticus 26:19
Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18
Ack!
I'm just about to leave my driveway, and I decide to check my cell to see if I missed any calls. I notice that the guy doing the lesson left me a voicemail. Oh no. Why didn't I check my messages yesterday? I'm so bad. I never check my messages! Why didn't he text?
So, I call him. He sounds very sorry. Turns out the 'building' of the facility is not quite complete. lol. I didn't even realize that it wasn't built yet! I felt badly for not checking my messages yesterday, therefore, causing him to feel badly. I assured him, he needn't worry. He said he really thought it would be done and now he's hoping for Monday. I said I couldn't reschedule until next weekend, but no big worry. He'll call me later this week.
So, was this a sign that I should not head out to visit Richard today (even though the boys haven't seen him in two weeks!?). I gave him a call to see what he wanted to do. How badly did he need the things I was bringing and did Norma need the mail that came to the house?
He had me come out anyhow. Secretly, I was VERY happy about this. I wanted to give him the BIGGEST masked and hand-sanitized kiss and hug EVER. I may not have a cold, but I have definitely lost my voice and I didn't want to take any chances. After taking off the mask, I just kept my distance, only spending my time rubbing his blanketed leg. Thank goodness Norma's staying near Richard or I would be at my wits end with worry about not being able to hug him.
I'm assuming that you're giving him LOTS of hugs Norma! Keep hugging him! I know you are!
And, I think she tells him how adorably handsome he is even MORE than I do!!!
I believe today, he said she was 'disgustingly optimistic' about everything! Funny! That's what people usually say about me!
If I haven't mentioned it before, Richard married his mother. (meaning me, being just like her, if you didn't get that).
So, yes, I'm assuming you figured out that the boys also got to visit Grannie. Even though the skate boarding lesson was supposed to be 10-12 and then we were going to be visiting Richard at 3pm, we were still able, thankfully, to cross paths with Grannie who was VERY happy to see the boys.
********A Break for a Thank You***********
Richard handed me over some 'gifts' from some cards. These appear to have been cards that arrived to Norma for Richard/us. Thank you to those who have sent cards and such this past month! So sweet!
Another thank you to Grannie who knitted AJ some socks to see if they solve his "my-socks-are-bugging-me" daily dilemma. Thanks again Grannie for spending time with Richard and staying close to him. Likewise, thanks to Bud who let's us keep her for a while! We couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thank you for all the ways you've been helping!
**********
After hanging out with Daddy, I took the boys to their favourite hospital playground (doesn't that sound sad?). It's just behind the parkade and a couple blocks down.
Then, we headed to Richmond to meet Grand-Dan at WhiteSpot for lunch (who had headed to Vancouver to meet us at WhiteSpot for lunch - Woops!). We met at the Richmond one after some confusion, that technically, was my fault, but understandably so.
He said, "I'll meet you at the Cambie WhiteSpot so you can get right on the highway with the HOV lane to the bridge." (this meaning Cambie in Vancouver)
I heard "Cambie......... WhiteSpot......... Highway..... HOV"
So, I headed to Richmond, and got off at 4 rd and Cambie (in Richmond, not Vancouver) to head to the WhiteSpot at which we usually meet, so that after I took the kids to Toys R Us (in Richmond), I could head over to the highway and take the tunnel and the HOV lane.
Oh well.
The boys fell asleep on the 15 minute drive to lunch.
So much for perfectly moving their routine by one hour. Pride bit me in the A$$ once again.
*********A Thank You Break************
Thank you Dad for lunch again and gas money and the offer of help whenever we need it. I tell you every time that you ARE a huge help! I'll see you on Thursday when I park at your place so you can drive me to sleep over at the hospital with Richard! We couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thank you for all the ways you've been helping!
*****************
I needed a second coffee at this point, which I never do because it makes me feel sick, but today was different. I decided not to go to the Richmond Toys R Us and instead went to the Langley one in the hopes the boys (or at least Dexter) might finish their nap on the way to fix the day.
Yah... no.
One day, I swear, I'm going to take them to Toys R Us when I don't have an agenda. I will just let them browse and say, "Wow! Look at this! Whoa! Wow!" They can spend a whole two hours. I'll bring a book or something.
Anyhow, I bought two Christmas gifts, as planned (one from AJ to Dex and one from Dex to AJ). I managed to get through the whole store without them noticing. I think. AJ saw one of the boxes, but I think I convinced him that it belonged to the guy ahead of us.
We headed home with the promise of the skate park for 15 minutes, then dinner, then pulling out my race car track that Richard bought me for Christmas about 6 years ago and putting it together.
Mission accomplished. The boys had a BLAST!
My Man
Yesterday, after confirming that he was still feeling outrageously horrible, I asked him to rate the horribleness on a scale of 1-10 (10 being the most horrible/I can't take it anymore).
He said, "6".
The whole not being able to swallow thing and using the suction just looks exhausting and annoying for him.
He doesn't enjoy the way the IV nutrition makes him smell.
I don't think he smells any different. He smells as handsome as always, and of course, his mom agreed.
I also thinks he looks perfectly handsome and warm and cuddly, and of course, his mom agreed.
I don't really know what else to say. To my knowledge, as rough as it is and as horrible as it is, the good news, so far, is that none of what he's going through is unusual for the circumstances.
We are still waiting to see how his stem cells react to his body. Maybe we'll see something this week. Hopefully, all good stuff!
He's been at 0 for white cells for about a week, and I'm guessing neutrophils too. Norma and I are counting down the days until we see the whites start moving up. Even .1 is exciting!
He's much quieter on the phone the past few days since the pain in the throat makes talking a lot, very difficult and he needs to get himself into a good position to be able to talk comfortably.
He says that he's spending a lot of time just sleeping.
I think he looks great.
He was a trooper and lasted an hour with the boys in the room visiting. I could see that AJ's having a bit of a tough time seeing Daddy so sick and not able to be sitting up and everything, but aside from acting a little weird, he was great little guy. They fit in some masked hugs at the beginning and Richard decided to risk his life with unmasked hugs for them after. The boys are pretty good in the hospital room. I can't explain enough how great it is that Richard isn't sharing a room. It's SOOOO much easier and calmer for the boys to visit. I assume that I won't be taking the boys for another couple weeks, but that kind of depends on how Richard's doing. We'll see.
I'm really not sure why I don't remember to bring the camera so you can 'see' how Richard is doing. I'll try to remember for Thursday. I'll get a picture of Grannie too!
***** Richard is on day 11/100 *****
He's just over a tenth of the way there!
Thinking about you 24/7, Babe.
I'm too tired right now to edit, so I'm just hoping my message comes across clearly. I'll fix it tomorrow, if I feel like it.
My Boys
A busy, but quiet morning some day this week.
And while I took a shower......
Puzzles!
AJ's been busy drawing some pretty cool characters lately.
It says, "thes R DIMObots".
Which he read out to me as, "These are Dimobots" ...... which are actually Dinobots. You know - From Transformers?
My BFFs
Tuesday, I told Jen to drop off her kids and my coffee so she could have a nice quiet time at Costco, and I think Walmart, and so I could be lazy instead of playing with my children.
Here are the Tuesday-friends:
Jaxon, Makenna, AJ, Emerson, and Dexter.
Jen wasn't gone too long and we got to visit once she came back. Thanks J.
Erica took AJ for a playdate on Wednesday while my sister was with the boys. I got to visit with Erica, myself, on Friday afternoon. Thanks E.
Girls, we couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thanks for all the ways you've been helping!
Sewing and Blogging and Avoiding My Feelings
So, I've been sewing lots this past week. Probably to avoid my feelings and being alone with my thoughts and just because it makes me happy. I was probably avoiding my housework too.
Then, I got some housework done. I was probably enjoying the sense of 'control'. Avoiding the lack of control that I have in real life right now.
Then, I came on the blog tonight, probably to avoid my sewing that I was using to avoid my housework and my feelings.
And what do I do on the blog? I talk about my feelings!
Craziness.
The Living Room
Slip Covers for my pillows.
Little blankets for the boys that double as covers for the cat-scratched arms of the couch. Darned #$%*& cats.
Our Bedroom
Pillows for decoration. I'm sure Richard will just LOVE their pointlessness and the fact that they are just one more thing to have to take off the bed before he goes to sleep at night.
The inspiration fabric that started it all.
Dexter's Room
This lady was selling a valance that matched Dexter's sports theme room perfectly. Used it to make two pillow cases and two trims for his comforter that I cut in half (to make two comforters).
Last Night
Mom and Ken (and Paul) came by for a great visit, to eat some of the boys Hallowe'en candy, thank goodness, to hang out, and to 'do a trade' involving them taking away some furniture.
It was a great visit, and after doing all that sewing I've been doing, I've been dying to show my mom what I've been up to. And of course, I got a big dose of much needed **Debbie-Cat.
**For the few of you out there who are unfamiliar with the term Debbie-Cat it is in reference to my mom's amazing ability to sincerely make someone feel like a million bucks doing anything. Hence, my reasonably great amount of self-confidence. When you grow up with a Debbie-Cat for a mom, you grow up thinking you can do anything and that everything you do is pretty great.
Why the 'cat' part? That's a story for another time, perhaps. Many of you already know. Maybe one day, I'll use my blog post for my sister, brother, and I's plans to make a Debbie-Dictionary. I don't think my mom would like that, but Kim, Paul, and I sure would.
***********A Thank You Break***************
Thanks Mom and Ken for coming by and everything else you've been doing. Thanks mom for taking the boys this upcoming Thurs/Fri so I can stay with Richard at the hospital again. We couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thanks for all the ways you've been helping!
********************
Today
I was so proud of myself for preparing the boys for the time change by working their bedtimes later and later through the month of October and their wake times too.
I was so proud of myself for remembering to turn the clocks back last night to make sure I was up in time to get to AJ's one-time skateboarding lesson in Vancouver at 10am.
I was so proud of myself for actually leaving the house by the planned time of 8am this morning with the kids packed, lunch packed, drinks packed, fun packed, dvd player packed, whiteboards packed, and looking pretty darned good I have to say. I felt good.
Now, y'all know it's not my thing, but, it fits in here perfectly.....
When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Proverbs 11:2
I will break down your stubborn pride. Leviticus 26:19
Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall. Proverbs 16:18
Ack!
I'm just about to leave my driveway, and I decide to check my cell to see if I missed any calls. I notice that the guy doing the lesson left me a voicemail. Oh no. Why didn't I check my messages yesterday? I'm so bad. I never check my messages! Why didn't he text?
So, I call him. He sounds very sorry. Turns out the 'building' of the facility is not quite complete. lol. I didn't even realize that it wasn't built yet! I felt badly for not checking my messages yesterday, therefore, causing him to feel badly. I assured him, he needn't worry. He said he really thought it would be done and now he's hoping for Monday. I said I couldn't reschedule until next weekend, but no big worry. He'll call me later this week.
So, was this a sign that I should not head out to visit Richard today (even though the boys haven't seen him in two weeks!?). I gave him a call to see what he wanted to do. How badly did he need the things I was bringing and did Norma need the mail that came to the house?
He had me come out anyhow. Secretly, I was VERY happy about this. I wanted to give him the BIGGEST masked and hand-sanitized kiss and hug EVER. I may not have a cold, but I have definitely lost my voice and I didn't want to take any chances. After taking off the mask, I just kept my distance, only spending my time rubbing his blanketed leg. Thank goodness Norma's staying near Richard or I would be at my wits end with worry about not being able to hug him.
I'm assuming that you're giving him LOTS of hugs Norma! Keep hugging him! I know you are!
And, I think she tells him how adorably handsome he is even MORE than I do!!!
I believe today, he said she was 'disgustingly optimistic' about everything! Funny! That's what people usually say about me!
If I haven't mentioned it before, Richard married his mother. (meaning me, being just like her, if you didn't get that).
So, yes, I'm assuming you figured out that the boys also got to visit Grannie. Even though the skate boarding lesson was supposed to be 10-12 and then we were going to be visiting Richard at 3pm, we were still able, thankfully, to cross paths with Grannie who was VERY happy to see the boys.
********A Break for a Thank You***********
Richard handed me over some 'gifts' from some cards. These appear to have been cards that arrived to Norma for Richard/us. Thank you to those who have sent cards and such this past month! So sweet!
Another thank you to Grannie who knitted AJ some socks to see if they solve his "my-socks-are-bugging-me" daily dilemma. Thanks again Grannie for spending time with Richard and staying close to him. Likewise, thanks to Bud who let's us keep her for a while! We couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thank you for all the ways you've been helping!
**********
After hanging out with Daddy, I took the boys to their favourite hospital playground (doesn't that sound sad?). It's just behind the parkade and a couple blocks down.
Then, we headed to Richmond to meet Grand-Dan at WhiteSpot for lunch (who had headed to Vancouver to meet us at WhiteSpot for lunch - Woops!). We met at the Richmond one after some confusion, that technically, was my fault, but understandably so.
He said, "I'll meet you at the Cambie WhiteSpot so you can get right on the highway with the HOV lane to the bridge." (this meaning Cambie in Vancouver)
I heard "Cambie......... WhiteSpot......... Highway..... HOV"
So, I headed to Richmond, and got off at 4 rd and Cambie (in Richmond, not Vancouver) to head to the WhiteSpot at which we usually meet, so that after I took the kids to Toys R Us (in Richmond), I could head over to the highway and take the tunnel and the HOV lane.
Oh well.
The boys fell asleep on the 15 minute drive to lunch.
So much for perfectly moving their routine by one hour. Pride bit me in the A$$ once again.
*********A Thank You Break************
Thank you Dad for lunch again and gas money and the offer of help whenever we need it. I tell you every time that you ARE a huge help! I'll see you on Thursday when I park at your place so you can drive me to sleep over at the hospital with Richard! We couldn't be getting through all this without you! Thank you for all the ways you've been helping!
*****************
I needed a second coffee at this point, which I never do because it makes me feel sick, but today was different. I decided not to go to the Richmond Toys R Us and instead went to the Langley one in the hopes the boys (or at least Dexter) might finish their nap on the way to fix the day.
Yah... no.
One day, I swear, I'm going to take them to Toys R Us when I don't have an agenda. I will just let them browse and say, "Wow! Look at this! Whoa! Wow!" They can spend a whole two hours. I'll bring a book or something.
Anyhow, I bought two Christmas gifts, as planned (one from AJ to Dex and one from Dex to AJ). I managed to get through the whole store without them noticing. I think. AJ saw one of the boxes, but I think I convinced him that it belonged to the guy ahead of us.
We headed home with the promise of the skate park for 15 minutes, then dinner, then pulling out my race car track that Richard bought me for Christmas about 6 years ago and putting it together.
Mission accomplished. The boys had a BLAST!
My Man
Yesterday, after confirming that he was still feeling outrageously horrible, I asked him to rate the horribleness on a scale of 1-10 (10 being the most horrible/I can't take it anymore).
He said, "6".
The whole not being able to swallow thing and using the suction just looks exhausting and annoying for him.
He doesn't enjoy the way the IV nutrition makes him smell.
I don't think he smells any different. He smells as handsome as always, and of course, his mom agreed.
I also thinks he looks perfectly handsome and warm and cuddly, and of course, his mom agreed.
I don't really know what else to say. To my knowledge, as rough as it is and as horrible as it is, the good news, so far, is that none of what he's going through is unusual for the circumstances.
We are still waiting to see how his stem cells react to his body. Maybe we'll see something this week. Hopefully, all good stuff!
He's been at 0 for white cells for about a week, and I'm guessing neutrophils too. Norma and I are counting down the days until we see the whites start moving up. Even .1 is exciting!
He's much quieter on the phone the past few days since the pain in the throat makes talking a lot, very difficult and he needs to get himself into a good position to be able to talk comfortably.
He says that he's spending a lot of time just sleeping.
I think he looks great.
He was a trooper and lasted an hour with the boys in the room visiting. I could see that AJ's having a bit of a tough time seeing Daddy so sick and not able to be sitting up and everything, but aside from acting a little weird, he was great little guy. They fit in some masked hugs at the beginning and Richard decided to risk his life with unmasked hugs for them after. The boys are pretty good in the hospital room. I can't explain enough how great it is that Richard isn't sharing a room. It's SOOOO much easier and calmer for the boys to visit. I assume that I won't be taking the boys for another couple weeks, but that kind of depends on how Richard's doing. We'll see.
I'm really not sure why I don't remember to bring the camera so you can 'see' how Richard is doing. I'll try to remember for Thursday. I'll get a picture of Grannie too!
***** Richard is on day 11/100 *****
He's just over a tenth of the way there!
Thinking about you 24/7, Babe.
I'm too tired right now to edit, so I'm just hoping my message comes across clearly. I'll fix it tomorrow, if I feel like it.
4 comments:
Was I EXCITED when i saw the white cell count of 0.1 today!!!!! It was so good to see all on Sun. Love Grannie
Looked at blog again and like the comment about Richard marrying his Mother. I take that as a real compliment. Thx!!! I think we may even have the same rare blood type. Norma
Well, awesome! That makes two of us!
Hey Guys
Just a quick hello, and letting you guys know we are constantly thinking of you throughout this fight. We are keeping as up to date as possible through phone calls from home and your blog.
We send our love to all of our family and friends involved. Stay strong.
Love Daniel, Jordan, and Trevor
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